Memories Fades,'

Sianz. Emo-ing right now. Dunno y sudden a gush of feelings jus come to me. Y issit like tat? Wats wrong with my damn f**king life. Is there something wrong with me? Y issit i irritate ppl so much? Y cant i ever do anything right. Y cant i fucking get a thing right. Y do i hav to fucking screw up so many ppl lives?

Haiz. am i such an irritant in u people eyes? If it is then i shall jus sit at one side, and refrain from bothering u all. Wat shld i do to improve myself? Tell me. So i can change this fucking fucked up Clement. I wan to be a Clement where by i can be a help but not more of an extra. ppl get angry with me very easily due to my fucking temper. Ya i know i must change tat, but issit tat easy to change it when u hav this fucking fucked up temper since primary school?

Ppl are talking and laughing, having so much fun. I think will jus coop myself in this fucking small room, where i wont be a nuisance of others. I bet when i get out of this room and sit with them, the whole table will cease their happiness. I always do tat. To my family, to other ppl. I always feel extra.

My family hav 5 members. Everytime, when my whole family is together, i will feel left out. Lets see, my father and mother will be together, my 2 brothers will be together, i will be left out behind or jus some where walking alone in front. Its like, i am totally not part of the family. Maybe its because tat my bro are brought up together by my auntie, whereas i am not. So, watever i do is an eyesore to them.

Even to my relatives, i can feel a sense of unhappiness when they talk to me. They will sound very impatient or watsoever. Teachers all find me talkative, disrupting and all hate me. I can definitely confirm tat i am a super nuisance in their life. Y cant i be like a super goody boy in class? Y cant i be like some people where they are liked by teachers? Jus spoilt Lyana marker box. Bet she must be thinking, 'bloody asshole go spoil my thing. So irritating, why wont he dun jus sit still and dun do anything.'

No one will ever be happy with me, so i think it will be a super good riddance from this world when i die. So, god jus let a useless piece of crap of me to die. Jus let me fucking die, i bet everyone will be holding a party to celebrate instead of being sad. So, if one day, i dun ever wake up from my sleep, maybe tats the time where the world will hav peace, and earth will be a perfect place to be in.

So, lets gladly and wait for tat day to arrive. Maybe, it may jus be tmw.

May darkness engulf me and never be seen again
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